How selfish am I?!

Well, sadly, the answer is: "Davida, you are quite selfish."

Recently, I did something for a friend of mine. However, I didn't get the response I wanted. At first I was upset. Then I had a thought, "If you really did that for your friend, why are you upset?" Hmm....maybe Someone was trying to get my attention. Well, He did. I realized that so many times I do stuff for people with wrong motives. Because I want them to like me or appreciate me....not because I truly want to serve them or bless them or make them happy. Yikes! My heart is ugly when I see it sometimes. Thankfully though, that is what He wants. My heart.

Ack!!!

Ok, so here i am at the cafe. trying to think of something interesting to fill this post. since i know you are on the edge of your seat. ready for some excitement. well, you might want to look somewhere else cuz all your gettin is a sum up of my weekend. haha!!! friday night was good, a bit rowdie (R-O-W-D-I-E thats the way we spell rowdie!...oooops....flashback. haha) had a nice talk with Dana. Saturday AM was good. Then went home...don't remember exactly what I did. haha! maybe i watched the wedding singer... no...hmm...i dunno. Saturday night i made pizza!!! yeah!!! I can make pizza!!! The first one was erm a bit crunchy cuz i forgot that the timer had gone off. but the second one was quite nice. Dana & I watched lord of the rings: the fellowship of the ring. she is SO funny....we were cracking up the whole time. i've never laughed so much watching those movies!! then i went on-line and was trying to download a song a friend...let's call him 'joey', sent me. however, it got to about 40% everytime and crapped out. argh! at least i got to hear a bit of it and ended up downloading it at the cafe on sunday, so i got to hear it in full then. :D anyway, sunday morning was good....watched columbo. :D i just love it. sad i know. haha! then got to chat with a friend that i hadn't chatted with in ages. (ok, so it was only three days, but it seemed like ages :p ) got ready and went to church which was great, blake shared about relationships and stuff. i was gonna go to a friends to watch movies, but she was sick. so went home and chatted with my friend again. heehee. hmm...yeah....guess thats about it. toodles!!!

ps - the reason this post is entitled "Ack!!!" is because it is 6:37 pm and i need to get home and change and get to my tai bo class by 7:30pm. plus i have to write some other important stuff and this guy...we'll call him "smartbox boy" was online....he would have gotten off sooner, if i had asked him i guess, but i was cleaning up so couldn't have been on anyway. he is a nice guy, i shouldn't be frustrated. heehee. after all, he gave me a pressie...this salt crystal dealio he found in the sea. but no worries, he doesn't need to be added to anyone's list. heehee

Globes and Maps by Something Corporate

Missing my family, missing the way things used to be, missing things that are gone. But yet, I don't want to leave.

light breaks underneath
a heavy door
and i try to keep myself awake
fall all around us on a hotel floor
and you think that you've made a mistake
and theres a pain in my stomach
from another sleepless binge
and i struggle to get myself up again
i want to hang onto something
that wont break away or fall apart
like the pieces of my heart

and globes and maps are all around me now
i want to feel you breathe me
globes and maps i see surround you here
why wont you believe me?
globes and maps they chartered your way back home
do you want to leave or something?

dreams came around youin a hazy rain
you open your mouth wide to feel them fall
and i write a letter from a one-way train
but i dont think youll read it at all

And globes and maps are all around me now
I want to feel you breathe me
why won't you believe me
And globes and maps i see surround you here
why won't you believe me?
Globes and maps they charter your way back home
Do you want to leave or something

i cant take this anymore
i know that i cant take this anymore
i cant take this anymore
cuz i know someday ill see you walk out that door

Globes and Maps are all around me now
I want to feel you breathe me
Globes and maps i see surround you here
why won't you believe me
Globes and maps they charter your way back home
do you want to leave, do you want to leave
Globes and maps they charter your way back home
Do you want to leave or something

Oh my.....what to write, what to write.....

It was a good day. Staff meeting, work, went to see Flight Plan. Didn't sleep well last night because it was raining buckets and woke me up at 3am. Never really got back to sleep properly after that. However, that said, at least I didn't have to wake up at 3:40am. I know this isn't much detail and nothing exciting, but sometimes, that is the way it is.

However, I do want to say I still have a smile on my face from a phone call I received this morning. :D Thank you!!!!

Somebody loves me and I love Him.

Today, on the way to the cafe, I stopped by World Hope to talk to Neissa and she if she wanted to have dinner or go for coffee tonight. Unfortunately, she had plans already, they have a guest speaker in town, so she couldn't do anything until a bit later. Anyway, she asked me if I wanted to join her and her english class tomorrow night and go see Flight Plan. It made me tear up a bit. I felt so loved in that moment. So remembered. So looked after. I had wanted to go see it tomorrow night, but my friend wasn't sure if she could go because she isn't feeling well. Instead I will go with Neissa and her class, plus if my friend is feeling better, she will come too. God really likes me and is so faithful to provide everything I need. Even friends to go see a movie with.

I am...

Talented. Gifted. Valuable. Beautiful. Funny. Smart. Thoughtful. Creative. Musical. Kind. Generous. Radiant. Vivacious. Tender-hearted. Gentle. Interesting. Charming. Captivating. Lovely. Lovable. Hug-able. Witty. Clever. Adventurous. Loved.

Crapola

Yup, that is what I felt like. I read something today that made me feel like a fool. Again. Like an idiot. Maybe I didn't understand it the right way, maybe I did. Maybe someone is trying to tell me something that I don't want to hear. But I would rather hear it now than later, if it is how I understood. It would save me a lot. The truth is something that I want, but maybe I can't handle it. At least not all at once. Or maybe it is all a misunderstanding. Maybe it is not all about me. *gasp* God, please help me see things clearly and for what they are!!!

um, so, yeah

i have lots of stuff to write here....lots of ideas at least. but i just need to sit down and write them. things are good now. had a great day so far. haven't done much but sleep, watch columbo and play a bit of online trivia. heehee. i needed the rest. time to get ready for church now. it shall be a great night....pastor marcus is here from innsbruck. lots of peeps will be there tonight. oh man....i just got a bit nervous. haha! i am silly. it shall be wonderful!! then, when i get back, i think i will make some cookies. my friend has a birthday tomorrow and she asked me to make her some cookies. and we have our 1 year anniversary party for the cafe tomorrow night too, so i'll make some for that too. alright kiddos, catch ya later!!!

Sometimes I feel like such a fool

Please don't ask me why.

A moment of silence, please

Today marks the end of an era. It lasted roughly five months. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. I knew it wouldn't last, I knew the end was near. Now that this day has come, I am somehow at peace with it. Today was the last day of the era of me having a car to use. The Conrady's returned to Split this afternoon. For that I am happy and honestly, it is better to have them here than to be able to use their car. We all missed them so much. Finally we will be together again. Alas, even that will be only for a little while. The Weir's leave soon...another era coming to an end. One I don't like to talk about. Although I am excited about what the next year holds and confident in the Hoybach's taking things over, I am sad to see the Weir's leave. I write this with tears in my eyes. I don't want them to go, that is selfish, I know, but true. Change isn't easy for me and saying goodbye is something I have done too often in my life. They will not be so far away, but still life will be different without them here. *cries*

Here we go....

Alright, first off, Croatian Holidays. I have to say, ya gotta love 'em! We just had one on November 1st. Since it was on a Tuesday, there wasn't school on Monday either. Which means that the cafe was closed. Monday was a complete day off!!! It was totally what I needed. :D Yay for that.

Wake up calls. I got three calls to wake me up in the morning this past week. Two of which I loved, one of which grated on my nerves like nails on a chalkboard. Let's get that last nasty one over with. It was Friday morning, I was awake but not up yet. This guy called me to tell me something. He asked if I was awake, I said sort of. He called me "sleepyhead" twice. *yuck!* I promise you, if only I would have had a frying pan, then again.....I am running out of room under the porch. teehee. On to better things.....the other two calls. :D What can I say? The first was a very pleasant surprise and the second was SO great. I love it when people do what they say they are going to do. :D

Karla's birthday party was a huge success!!! She had a great time and a bunch of her friends came. We hung out, had pizza and birthday cake. Everyone played Apples to Apples. She got some cool presents. Oh, and I can make Fransuska Salata!!! I made it for her party and it turned out yummy!

Life in general....hmm...I don't quite know where I was going with that one.....but things are good at the moment. Enjoying the autumn, which is nice.

Dana!!!! She is my new roomie, been here for about a week. She is a cool girl from Arizona. The second night she was here, we stayed up until 2am talking. It was quite fun!!

Anyway, that is the update from last week...hope you enjoyed it. :D

Blog Topics

ok, this isn't actually a post per se but rather a list of things i want to blog about...erm...this weekend i guess. it isn't that nothing has happened this week, it is just i haven't had time to write anything.

Here are a few topics that i want to expand on:
- croatian holidays
- wake up calls
- karla's birthday party
- i can make fransuska salata!!!
- life in general
- my new roomie, Dana

Welp, that is about it, stay tuned for further details. hahahahaha!!!